What Niemöller might have written if he was one of the guys I went to Hebrew School with
(Warning: There are curse words.)
First they came for the Communists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Communist
“Actually, I did speak out. I knew the Communists were just a bunch of assholes who think that the world is against them and everything is unfair. And I said that on social media, and even to the faces of some of my erstwhile friends. I mean, quit whining and get to work, right? I work hard, and life hasn’t been unfair to me. So it can’t be unfair to everyone else. Because I am the center of the universe.”
Then they came for the Socialists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Socialist
“Of course I wasn’t a Socialist. I mean, Socialists aren’t much better than Communists. Socialists keep telling me that I am not the center of the universe, and I only think I’m the center of the universe because I’m ‘privileged.’ I didn’t grow up with money! I worked hard for my money! Yeah, so my dad gave us the downpayment for our house. He worked hard for his money, too! He took the dry goods business his father built and expanded it to hundreds of stores around the state. I barely saw my father, he worked so hard. Now, these socialists want me to share with them? Fuck that noise.”
Then they came for the trade unionists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a trade unionist
“Of course, I’m not a trade unionist. I pay the legal minimum wage and nobody is going to tell me how to run my business! They are all a bunch of lazy assholes who want to benefit from my hard work.
“And let’s get this straight. Men are men and women are women. None of this ‘gender fluid’ bullshit. It’s just not right. I mean, I’m a man. And I should know. Because I’m always right.
“While we’re at it, slavery was a long time ago. Don’t tell me this shit about redlining and DNA trauma. People pull themselves up by their bootstraps all the time. Look at Clarence Thomas. You just need to act more like white people. What’s wrong with you?
“Now women think everyone is coming for them. Pu-lease. Women get paid less because they take time off from work to be with their kids. There is no other explanation. They don’t leave because the men they work with keep throwing out ‘micro-aggressions.’ I mean, what does that even mean? ‘Oh, you hurt my feelings!’ Grow a pair!”
Then they came for the Jews
“Oh… fuck. What is wrong with these people? Where is this anti-Semitic stuff coming from? For the first time in my life, I’m afraid.
We’re heading to another Holocaust.”
First they came for the Communists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Communist
Then they came for the Socialists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Socialist
Then they came for the trade unionists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for the Jews
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Jew
Then they came for me
And there was no one left
To speak out for me
When one of us is oppressed, we are all oppressed.
That’s what I (Carrie, not the satiric persona above) learned growing up Jewish in Post WWII America. Sadly, I have in my lifetime encountered too many of my fellow Jews who didn’t learn that lesson.
Now, I wonder… Is it too late? Again?